It's Time!

Tomorrow we'll be in El Salvador!  It doesn't even seem real yet & I don't think it will until I actually step foot in El Salvador.  We're leaving the house at 3:30am and heading to Norfolk where we'll fly out at 5:45am.  I think it goes without saying that I won't be sleeping tonight.  I am beyond excited; I feel like a kid on Christmas Eve.  I skyped with Lauren earlier today and we talked about how our lives were radically changed last summer.  I learned so much and in many ways became a completely new person.  To summarize our conversation...last summer rocked my world and changed my perspective.  I wouldn't say that I was 'culture shocked' because I had a pretty good idea of what the culture would be like.  Rather, my mindset was altered.  I realized that so many things that I place such a high priority and importance on are petty and meaningless in the big scheme of thing.  When you live with eternity in mind, other things seem so small.  I know I've mentioned it before but 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 is something that I have to constantly remind myself of.  I am so excited to see what God will reveal to me during these next two weeks.  I can see God's hand in this trip.  His provisions and faithfulness have blown me away.  I worried about money, planning and details but God had a perfect plan the whole time.  God knows my heart and He knows that I have been longing to return to El Salvador since I left there last summer.  Gah, I can't wait!

So, we do have a tentative daily schedule and I will share that with ya'll so you have an idea of what we'll be doing. 

Morning - CISNA
Early Afternoon - Lunch/Transportation to CIPI
Late Afternoon - CIPI
Evening - Return to Promise House

I know it's not very detailed but that's what we have for now.

Well, I still have some packing and organizing to get to so I better get on that.  I thank you all for your prayers and support and will update you as soon as I can when we arrive and get settled in.  For those of you praying specifically I'd ask that you pray for the following;
-Safe and easy travel (I really hate to fly!)
-That we would remain healthy
-That we keep our focus on God alone.
-That in spite of all the hardship and sadness we will be in contact with, we will remember that God is still in control.

As Promised...Update 5/19/10

We are now less than 2 weeks away from our departure.  It is really hard for me to believe that.  June seems so far away and yet it's actually right around the corner.  In just four weeks we'll already be back in the USA. Weird.
Anyway, I thought I would just send out an update on a few of the details/plans so that those of who you are interested in following our progress would be aware.  First off, I'd really like to thank all of you who have been praying for the trip and for us as we prepare to go.  God has made it VERY clear to me that this is HIS trip and He is in control.  He has had to remind me of that more than once (more than twice actually) and He has used a variety of circumstances to do so.  The hard part, however, is loosening my grip, laying aside my pride and keeping my eyes focused on Him only.  I am learning and I've found these past few weeks to be a period of painful growth that I am extremely thankful for and humbled by.  I'm glad that God is patient. :)  Okay so now...updates.
The Promise House is at capacity so we will be staying in a mission house that is run by a family who have been living and serving in El Salvador for the past several years (The Ackermanns).  They are actually the family that I stayed with on my first trip to El Salvador (in 2007) & they are awesome so it's cool that we'll be staying there.  I was a little disappointed at first that we weren't able to stay at the PH but I am so glad to hear that it is full of girls who desperately need a place to go.  Besides, we are still going to be able to spend time with them and I am really looking forward to that!  As far as daily schedules go, the tentative plan, which will undoubtedly change on a minute to minute basis (I just love cultural differences haha), is to spend the mornings with the girls in the detention center at CISNA, spend the afternoons at CIPI (the girls, younger boys and baby orphanage) and spend the evenings with the girls from the Promise and Hope houses.  Weekend plans are: one Saturday at Atami (yesssss!!!), one Saturday at the marketplace and both Sundays going to church across from the Faith House and just spending time with some of the coolest people in the entire world (I am not exaggerating).
Whew, now that I just typed all that out I am even more excited.  It's going to fly by but I know that there is a lot to do and a lot to learn while we are there.

I'm already dreading the day we have to leave El Salvador!

Pensamientos

At 3pm today my summer will officially begin!  Now that classes are over and I am (almost) done doing check outs and moving myself out of my room, I have had some time to think about the fact that three weeks from Tuesday, we will be in El Salvador!  It still hasn't hit me as a reality yet and it probably won't until I step foot in the country.  Since I got back last summer I don't think a day has gone by that I haven't thought about El Salv or the people there.  Part of me feels like it's been forever since I was there but the memories I have are so incredibly vivid that part of me feels like it was just yesterday.  When I think about going back I am filled with so many different emotions, it's ridiculous.  Most of the emotions are ones you'd expect (such as excitement, happiness, anticipation, etc.) but there are some others as well; including stress, sadness and fear. I'll elaborate...

First of all, I am continuing to fight a daily battle against stress.  I'm learning that it's okay to not have a "plan" but it's still something I struggle with.  I wanna know what we're doing & where we're doing it at and as of right now, I still don't know.  However, from experience, I know that plans in El Salvador change on a minute to minute basis so maybe not having a plan is the best route to take!

So why would I feel sadness about such an exciting thing?  Well, I am sad because I know what I'm going to see.  Last summer I pretty much went into the experience blindly; not knowing what to expect.  My life was forever changed by the people I met and the horrific stories I heard.  These people are so broken and so desperately in need.  This emotion ties in with fear because I'm afraid to be reminded and I'm afraid of leaving again.  I literally felt my heart break when I left last summer; something that I had never experienced before and I don't know if I'm prepared to experience it again.  I remember calling my parents when I boarded the plane to come home, crying uncontrollably.  It was the absolute worst feeling.  I don't want to start out this trip by dreading the end of it but I have a feeling that it will be constantly in the back of my mind.  How can I leave again??

Those are the thoughts for now.  Sorry it's not too 'uplifting' but I hope, at the least, that it is real and transparent :)

Details

First of all, let me apologize for not sharing information with you all sooner.  Many of you have been asking me and I have been unable to give you any details (mostly because I didn't have any).  The planning process has been a bit of a challenge; mostly because I've been trying to juggle school, work and life in addition to working towards the final plans of this trip.  Although I like to think that I'm good at multi-tasking and staying level headed in stressful and overwhelming situations, that is not always the case.  I'm a "passionate" person (which is a nice way of saying that I tend to freak out).  That being said, I really need to thank my parents for helping me out and talking me through things.  Also, a big thanks to Robert (our trip coordinator) and others at Orphan Helpers who have put in extra hours and effort to nail down these details.  And obviously, God has never failed me and continues to teach me lessons daily.  My faith has been tested and I'm realizing that there is a huge difference between saying you have faith and living like you have faith.

So here's what we have so far...
We're leaving out of Norfolk on June 1 and flying to El Salvador (with a lay-over in Atlanta).  We'll arrive in San Salvador around noon.  The airport in San Salvador is fairly easy to navigate so once we get through and get our bags, we'll be met by our driver and taken to where we'll be staying.  I wanted to stay in the Promise House again but unfortunately that isn't going to be a possibility.  Last summer there were 9 girls and their 9 children living there but they now have about 12 girls and babies, so there really isn't any room for additional bodies.  At this point, we're planning on staying with a family (the Ackermanns) who are missionaries in San Salvador and have a mission house.  The good news is, it's only about 3 blocks from the PH.  We will be in the country until June 14th.  Our daily activities are not set in stone yet but the plan is to spend the mornings in one of the government centers (CISNA or CIPI) and the afternoons with the girls and children in the Promise House.  More information about that will be coming once we have specifics.  I'll also post some info about the centers so you have a better idea/understanding of what I'm talking about.  If you're so curious and just can't wait you can try looking through some of my old blog posts from last summer :)

To all of you who have been asking, thank you so much for taking such an interest in our trip and for all of your thoughts and prayers.  Please continue to pray that the details get worked out and that things go as smoothly as possible.  I really am excited to see so many of the people that I have been missing since I left last summer and I wish that I could personal introduce each and every one of them to all of you.


"Faith is the art of holding onto things your reason has once accepted in spite of your changing moods."
-C.S Lewis